Tuesday 31 January 2012

Redknapp's Going Down

Is it allowable under FA rules for someone to manage the England team from Ford Open Prison?

The HMR&C campaign against different aspects of football fraud, tax avoidance, money laundering and, soon, illegal insider betting activity is parallelling along on numerous fronts - Harry Redknapp and Milan Mandaric, Rangers FC, Portsmouth FC, and other potential routes of investigation still to be unearthed via Quest and the News of the World scandals etc etc.

Football needs to get real as their 'in-the-loop' focus on untouchable hyperrealities is in for a continued rude awakening - the HMR&C are on a strategic medium-term drive to clean up black and black/grey market football.

Two of these issues reached a conjunction in Southwark Crown Court yesterday.

Harry Redknapp earned £3 million per year in 2002, increasing to £4.2 million per annum when Pompey reached the Premier League.
We know of NO OTHER FOOTBALL MANAGER IN THE WORLD who was receiving this level of wage at that time...
... not Ferguson, Capello, Mourinho, Sven-Goran Useless.

And for a second tier team initially!!

He obviously deserved the award of Freeman of the City of Portsmouth for the Fixed FA Cup Final victory over Cardiff City refereed by one Mike Dean.

But did he deserve it for taking so much money out of the club (asset stripping, we would call it), for the resulting sale of half a squad, for the decline that has seen six owners of various shades of criminality and from various global mafiosi mis-run the club in the last two years, for the rampant insider gambling undertaken at the club when he was manager, for the fact that the HMR&C issued a winding-up order against Pompey yesterday?

Telegraph: "Staff and players at Portsmouth will not receive their January wages on time... the club's bank account is now frozen."

An aside are the issues of the £## million bet by one ####### ###### ####### at one bookmaker in ######### in one season or the ##### property empire in the capital as these things are not illegal.

Mandaric, Redknapp and Storrie are the primary reasons that Portsmouth FC is merely a shell of its former self.

But who needs enemies when your friends produce court narratives like the following from Mandaric:
"But I never had a relationship as I had with Harry."

We bet you didn't, sir!!!

And while we're at it, we are quite partial to $145K gifts for no reason whatsoever, if ever the money is burning a hole in your pocket...

Is it any wonder that Jamie Redknapp is looking so concerned?

When a result is needed (to put it in football parlance), the state and the judiciary work together - witness the four year jail term for the tweeting non-rioter from Northwich.
For the HMR&C to be taking on the likes of Redknapp, Murray and, in particular, Mandaric suggests that they mean business with The Business.
There is too much riding on the outcome with respect to HMR&C, Quest and the police investigation team, the EPL white corruption campaign, the pressure from the Astonishing Michel Platini and UEFA both on club debts and club illegalities, and even the BBC who aired the original Panorama programme that sparked the whole kaboodle.

"Ensuring tax is paid on time should be at the centre of a football club's business strategy just like any other business," said an HMR&C spokesperson.
"Anyone that regards paying tax as an optional extra, or that uses tax collected from employees or customers as working capital, is potentially heading for trouble."

A Tiny Tip Of An Immense Iceberg...

British Footballing Omerta Is Cracking - It Is Everyone For Themselves Amongst The Antisocials.

Truly.
Football Fans Should Be Happy.

Monday 30 January 2012

Today From Football is Fucked, We Bring You...

The Complete Collapse of the January Transfer Window

Walcott Chats Shit

For How Long Will Joe Jordan and Kevin Bond be Running Spurs?

Why Mike Dean Should Not Be A Referee

Why Cricket Is Criminalised And Corrupt

Check Today's Breaking Realities At Our Other Football Blog:

http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/
http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/
http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/
http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/
http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/

Sunday 29 January 2012

What An Incredible Fluke IV!

The FA Cup Draw gave us a one in three and a half thousand chance that The Racism Derbies (Liverpool v Man Utd and QPR v Chelsea) would be sequelled.

Amidst massive extra police costs and abundant blurtings of racism, the two teams associated with racist behaviour won via a dubious penalty and through one of the victims of racism making the mistake that produced the winner having been under intense racist and/or verbal abuse throughout the previous couple of hours.

In what way do the FA see this as a victory for the Kick It Out campaign?

But one in three and a half thousand!

What a weird fluke!

Saturday 28 January 2012

Today From Football is Fucked, We Bring You...

A Game for Real Men

Cricket is Fucked Too

How Fixing Games Does Not Pay Career-Wise

Bung! Bong! Gong! Dung!

Eight Things We Learned From The Racism Derbies

To find out more visit our new multiverse at

http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/

Who Controls The Referees?

A core problem locus in English football is the Professional Game Match Officials Board (PGMOB).

This body, which oversees the management and appointment of referees and junior officials for matches, is simply not fit for purpose and needs to be deconstructed and reformed...
... with immediate effect.

The PGMOB was, of course, not fit for purpose under Keith Hackett but since the powers-that-be placed Mike 'Kipper' Riley in the hotseat, the organisation has become rancid.
The most obvious modus operandi, as seen externally, would be one where different corrupt power operators within the game bid for their selected match official to be appointed while the EPL moves in and imposes its own representatives on matches of consequence.
Of course, this cannot be true because Kipper tells us that the process is random.

But random this process is not...
... nor meritocratic.

This Stalinesque body that refuses to speak to the media, aside from when they are forced to justify stopping a gay referee from coming out, imposes Pavlovian discipline to disguise its misdmeanours. EPL managers have all learned (with the exception of Mick McCarthy) that if you complain about a blatantly amateurish performance by a match official then you will undoubtedly suffer to an even greater extent in the next match until you learn to stay quiet and 'respect my authority' as Cartman might put it.
The outcome for the fan is a bunch of dodgy games with dodgy happenings that nobody comments about for fear of future unemployment-inducing refereeing.

Simple.

The structures are so psychopathic at the PGMOB, and throughout the British game, that we don't need to risk libel in exposing information and data that is, quite frankly, beyond statistical likelihood or comprehension.

There is an arbitrage in reality at play here!!!

For example.

Take the previously mentioned Jonathan Moss - the 'coincidences' regarding the number of West Bromwich Albion games that he gets to officiate and the immensely peculiar tilt in his decision-making in those matches.

Since being promoted to the PGMOB Select Group in the summer, Mr Moss has been referee or 4th Official six times in 26 West Brom matches.
In the light of his historical decision-making in West Brom matches, is this valid or wise?
Seven times Mr Moss had refereed WBA, 7 victories, 4 penalties in favour and none against, 3 sendings off in favour and none against. Then on his first Select Group appearance refereeing the Throstles, he gave them a penalty in a highly suspicious Carling Cup Tie at Everton.

We are absolutely not suggesting any conscious shenanigans by Jonathan Moss, he is no doubt just a twitcher who loves his throstles.
Mr Moss is a headmaster, he looks after our children. Our futures are in his hands.
He is undoubtedly a pillar of society.
He would not consciously act inappropriately.

But the data reveals an unconscious bias that, alongside the sheer quantity of appointments to WBA games, should be picked up on and handled and resolved by the PGMOB.
And if not by them, then by the EPL.

But all we have historically got from the EPL is 'Give the Refs Respect', 'Get on with the Ref, Get on with the Game' and other such meaningless monikers to disguise the murk.

Why is there such sloppiness about such a key area of the game?
Referees decide matches.
In Total Poker, control of the referee is only trumped by control of both goalkeepers or an agreed 3 for 3/2 for 2 event between the teams.

The PGMOB has to be reformed and the manner in which officials are selected must be radically altered.
Riley has to go and a randomised yet meritocratic process initiated.
There should be far more than 19 referees on the Select Group and the practice where the three top officials are able to cover 5 EPL games in one weekend (as ref or 4th official) is a matrix purely designed for corruption.

Three referees in charge of 5x £1 billion markets would set alarm bells ringing in any structure of integrity!

In Spain, Italy and the UEFA competitions, the listing of match officials are generally only released the day prior to the window and, additionally, the bodies that are making the appointments don't leak like a sieve.
That would be a start.
By releasing match officials early, the PGMOB allows a larger window for bribery, coercion or control to make their mark which is one of the primary reasons why over 90% of the very late changes in match officials in the major European leagues occur in England.

FIFA and UEFA 'own' the game.
FIFA is systemically corrupt and will remain so until a clean broom sweeps through.
Corrupt consortia and rogue officials only own discrete quantum realities within the game.
They are able to be peripheralised.

How we hear you ask?

i) By facing up to the fact that the global sport is endemically corrupted by insider gambling syndicates and operations and that the only way to stop this underground behaviour is to introduce legality into the highly liquid Asian betting markets that dominate the sport.

ii) Video replays for all contentious decisions - each manager getting three calls per game, for instance.

iii) Replacing Bettor Blatter with Someone Better ie the Very Remarkable Michel Platini.

Simple.

China is looking to move onto the next stage of economic advancement.
This is the stage where the centre of gravity moves from grey/black market state capitalism to grey market state capitalism.
You may rest assured that the Chinese powers-that-be will force this squillion dollar industry further within their control.

However the EPL/PGMOB choose to select strategy, their days of psychopathic templating are severely limited.

The days of the British hei shao (black whistle) are numbered.

© Football is Fixed 2006-2012

Friday 27 January 2012

What An Incredible Fluke III!

Last Sunday, a policeman refereeing the City v Spurs game gave City a penalty, denied Spurs one and didn't send Balotelli off for something he quite evidently witnessed.

One week in court...

Friday night, an FA Cup tie with another policeman refereeing, in fact the same policeman who allegedly robbed Spurs at Stoke in December - Redknapp claiming that it was the worst refereeing performance he had witnessed in 30 years!

Keeping the pressure on.

The random selection of two policeman to ref the matches adjacent to the first week of Harry's case is a 1.74% chance.

What a weird fluke!

Fractal Football and Gizan Geysers


The Pyramids of Giza serve as a graphic to help describe a simple 3-D model of corruption in football

The power pyramid on the left represents agents, betting, mafia.
The power pyramid on the right represents the ruling bodies, the national associations, major leagues.
The power pyramid in the centre represents the territory where these two other pyramids mingle - the upper part of the central pyramid is the white market, the lower half is the grey market and the underground is the underground.

Any organisation, cartel, consortia, committee, institution, and any of their tentacles of operation may undertake quantised interactions with any other entity in either of the side pyramids. These equilibria exist at various layers in the central pyramid depending upon their degree of opacity. Clusters frequently develop but swiftly disperse due to a bounty of proprietary (and often antisocial) agendas.

When we delve into the dire, diabolical, desperate, difficult, dangerous, dodgy world of the underground, one might discover that the same equilibria repeatedly develop.

Betting dominates the left hand power pyramid - that is where all the various interests choose to coincide.
Committee poisons the right hand power pyramid.
Their combination is disastrous for football.

Because the brand is everything, we are presented with a truly Orwellian world where bodies like UEFA and the EPL undertake 'white corruption' to undermine more serious forms of 'grey/black corruption'.
For UEFA, an East European team backed by gun running in Transdniestria or a dodgy penalty to the crappy French team?
For EPL, allow a mass insider cornered market on a Premier League game or take actions to challenge that criminality?

Because the brands cannot be tainted, they play with our neohyperrealities.

In the good old days of fixed football in the 90's, every so often a game would come up that was fixed - Juventus v Piacenza, say, after Gianni Agnelli's death.
Nowadays, there are very few top flight European league matches that don't have several competing power bases all believing that they have control of the event.

Total Football.
Forget that...
... what we are dealing on here, girls and boys, is Total Poker.

A number of insiders around a virtual table with Dark Pool inputs and individual operators controlling their bids. Player A looks comfortable with a midfielder and some injury information, while Player B is hoping that the 4th Official might influence the referee, but Player C owns a team and the opposing goalie and is piling on the chips.

Under Blatter, the global game has deteriorated to this gambling spectacle we witness today, as he and his cronies stuff the booty in their bags and run for cover.

To their credit (limited in certain cases, very limited in others), UEFA and the Amazing Mr Platini, Interpol, HMR&C, some European bookmakers, the EPL and, most critically in the world of the middle pyramid, the Asian market makers are attempting to dislodge rogue consortia from the game.
All but the most psychopathic understand that the time has come to rein in the corruption - the general public are in no mood to countenance being ripped off by crowds of addicted shysters.
The EPL has finally discovered that the psychopathic template has its limitations
The system is not accepting further destabilisation.

This might not clean the game up in the medium term but at least we will have a classier form of fix!

© Football is Fixed 2006-2012

Today From Football is Fucked, We Bring You...

How John Colquhoun Unconsciously Helped Celtic Win A Title While Playing for Hearts

John Colquhoun Loves Jonathan Moss Loves Mike Riley

One Agent, Three Goalkeepers, One Offshore Bookmaker, Three Referees and Lots of Money

Football is Fucked Bet of the Day

To find out more visit our new multiverse at

http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/

Thursday 26 January 2012

Pay Me My Money Down

Introducing the brand new blog from those Football is Fixed people - Football is Fucked (http://footballisfucked.blogspot.com/).

Think of it, if you must, as Football is Fixed without big words and without hope for the game.

Think of this as our Opening Ceremony.

If Football is Fucked were Art, We would be Spaceheads.

Pay Me My Money Down.

Fat Wallet Got Us Under Its Thumb

A Wobbly Club and a Wobbly Face

Two pieces of excellent news for the lovers of integrity in football.

I spent yesterday afternoon with two very senior officials from HM Revenue & Customs.
This was a most fruitful discourse.

Aside from matters relating to the current spheres of reality, off the record we touched on two other matters, Rangers FC and the trial of Honest Harry Redknapp.

In the former, it is regarded as an absolute certainty that Rangers will go into administration.
Good.
This is because of the nature of the Employee Benefits Trust (EBTs) used by the club.
An EBT may be legal or not and in the case of the Hun it would appear most definitely that the latter is the truth.

Even the club themselves realise this is the case as the following clip from the 'Rangers Tax Case' website reveals (http://rangerstaxcase.com/).

"The problems for Rangers started with the fact that footballers and their agents would never be so daft as to trust a ‘nod and a wink’ from a football club executive. Amounts for salaries, bonuses, appearance fees- are all the subject of written contracts. These contracts (which are routinely available during tax investigations) provide the Rosetta Stone for tax investigators. I cannot discuss some of the other evidence against Rangers FC, but I understand that at least some of Rangers FC executives were aware that what they were doing was illegal."

The result is, according to my friends at the HMR&C is that the club won't even get the option of taking a points hit and a relegation (or two) but will, in fact, have to reform as Rangers King Billy 1692 or something similar in the amateur leagues.

And as icing on the cake, Murray the Former Property Baron turned up at the club on Tuesday and two potential 'Gers signings were instantly sent packing...
... no money you see.

And Jelavic is only going through the motions as he wants out.

Meanwhile in Southwark, the view of my esteemed friends is that the Cockney Rebel is also going down.

Firstly, the HMR&C are directly and significantly targeting the football industry with agents/bungs/betting being the primary focuses.
The shared view is that Redknapp/Mandaric are scapegoats.

Secondly, the Southwark 2 exist in a world where they have no idea where the boundaries of legality lie.

Thirdly, the insider HMR&C opinion is that there are many good lines of legal defence but that the following statement from Redknapp is not one of them.

"A bung don't come into it — it's a payment. A bung, that's a f*cking sick word. It's a bonus. If it was dodgy I would have gone and brought the f*cking money back in a suitcase."

Mmmm...
... "I didn't murder him, your honour, but I would have done if necessary..."

© Football is Fixed 2006-2012

Wednesday 25 January 2012

Police and Thieves

Mario Balotelli's agent, Mino Raiola, has criticised both Howard Webb and Harry Redknapp.

About Redknapp he said: "Don't make me speak about Redknapp because it will make me really mad. It's not normal what they do in England."

No it isn't normal at all...
... it is abnormal.

As as Benjamin, Millon and Davis and the Journal of Abnormal Psychology has been kind enough to inform us in the past, narcissistic personality disorder + antisocial personality disorder = psychopathic personality disorder.

This formula is true in the singular and en masse.

All individuals, consortia, cartels and others who seek absolute control of financial realities with no account of any societal downside are psychopathic.

English Football is Psychopathic.

And in response to his suggestion that Webb should be banned for life, the PGMOB issued a statement stating: "The integrity of our officials is beyond reproach."

Lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol - sidesplitting laughter rips round the office.

No Kipper Riley...
... the integrity of some of your officials is besmirched by rampant cr########y.

In fact, take a glance at matches involving ##### ######## and #### #### for instance, or #### ######.
Or goalkeepers from one agent, with one offshore bookmaker and certain match officials, for instance.

Kipper Chat Shit.

© Football is Fixed 2006-2012

Tuesday 24 January 2012

"To Be Honest" Its Snow Globe Time

Private market in Asia mockingly offering 1.47 that Redknapp either sent down or forced to reach an accommodation about his past income as well as his future revenue streams.

Rumour going around that bank acct Rosie 47 originally named 'Rosebud'...

D'oh!

Even Homer could rig a football match more professionally than the British criminal classes.

It is little wonder that our sport, this game of football, is TOTALLY controlled by Asian underground bookmakers whose expertise on both the sport and the behaviouralisms of another culture show the crims up as the psychopathic antisocials they are.

One of the reasons that the Stoke v West Brom match was fixed at the weekend was the presence of Chinese New Year yesterday.
The tip-top Asian market makers all take an elongated break over the holiday either closing down their operations or allowing juniors to co-ordinate trading at much reduced volume.
The impact is both less professional money entering the world betting markets from Asia and, consequently, a greater ease for other consortia to attempt to corner a market.

With the police closing in on Harry Redknapp and Rosie 47 and tax evasion and the tip of the iceberg that is RedknappWorld, both UEFA and the English Premier League taking stances against the criminalised networks corrupting the sport (those below them in the feeding frenzy at least) and the new Interpol Whistle-blowing Telephone Line soon to be active, these are risky times for murkiness.

Saturday's match was just a shit gig, a casual criminality from antisocials who believe that they are so sophisticated that their crookery will not be spotted...
... or acted upon.

There are some key questions arising from the current state of play.

The EPL, some bookmakers, top trading organisations and, particularly, the Asian underground knew all about the Stoke v West Brom match prior to kick off.
The betting patterns are highly suspicious on the match.
Highly...

There are organisations and bodies like Early Warning GmbH and Interpol who are supposed to spot suspicious betting patterns and act on them. These people are supposed to be forensic in their examination.
Wouldn't one think that an obvious place to start looking are visually suspicious events where one team is linked to bookmakers that are, obviously unknowingly, profiting from the rogue match in question?
D'oh.

In any other area of criminal investigation, aside from the obvious one of racist murders, investigators use such links to build the picture.
Why not in the rampant corruption of football?
D'oh.

Some underground Asian firms were seeing million pound bets on the Stoke v WBA game.
Even Betfair saw some late £25K positions against Stoke.

And take Betfair, or any bookmaker for that matter.
They accept bets that they know are insider trading (John Colquhoun bet with Betfair when we were evaluating him and they didn't close his account or refer his positions to any external body. No they did not. They presumably utilised this knowledge as inside information and adjusted their market profile accordingly).
Every bet by an insider should be reported.
Why is this not the case?
D'oh.

Or take mainstream journalists.
Some of them talk with us and the scene created is one of insider information serving as an alternative currency in the newsrooms, as exposure in media and positive representation in media are associated with insider betting information.
Is it little wonder that no mainstream journalist is allowed to publish details of this endemic and systemic corruption?
D'oh.

Slick trading organisations are very particular about isolationism and leakage of information.
For the purposes of longevity of competitive advantage, trades are secreted away.
And these trades, at least in the case of our bunch, are based on careful analysis of all aspects of the game - we do cybernetics and pattern recognition at speed and we don't want anyone other than our broker knowing what we are doing, thank you very much.
We hedge at Betfair and elsewhere and trade on the peripheral markets or micro-adjust positions at best price in Europe...
... but this is just noise.

That people think that they are able to get away with Stoke v WBA-type scams shows either extreme stupidity (which we doubt) or a culture of anything goes cowboy poker on our beloved sport.
That would be very rich people, many of whom owe their huge wealth to football, who, not content with uber-wealth, wish to gain more opium for their offshore bank accounts by ripping off everybody else involved in the event.

What gives these criminals, for that is exactly what they are, the right to abuse the poor and the not-so-poor in this manner?
D'oh.

Interestingly, in the US, the super-super rich are reinventing themselves.
For instance, many sympathise with the Occupy movement according to the Economist and feel that capitalism has become too corrupt.
They revisit history to marginalise their own activities in criminal bodies to distance themselves from this altogether shoddier form of psychopathy.
It is even happening in Britain between the EPL and rogue consortiums over particular football matches.

From our perspective, strictly as traders and analysts, rogue consortiums are a pain in the neck.
Not only are they destroying the game, they are also undermining professional analysts from improving the efficiency of the markets - our one public good (aside from whistle-blowing, that would be).
Hyperreal Man-Made Black Swan events in football markets are a complete destruction of the integrity of the market.
Now why doesn't an operator who loses on a rigged match take legal action against the match-fixers?
D'oh.

It doesn't take a five sigma evaluation or an understanding of the fourth level of the multiverse to jigsaw together what we are dealing with here.
D'oh...

And.
Anyway.
Who Guards the Feckin' Guardians?
D'oh.

No-one.
That is exactly who.

Football is Fucked...

© Football is Fixed 2006-2012

Monday 23 January 2012

More Reasons to Shop Sorensen?

There are a number of questions that need to be aired over the English Premier League match between Stoke City and West Bromwich Albion.

The game was settled by two goalkeeping errors from Stoke's man with a Squiggle, Thomas Sorensen.

The man might be a Squiggly goalie...
... but is he a convincing actor?

Just to remind you - the first West Brom goal squirmed through Squiggly and was so amusing to the man that he was troubled with disguising his laughter. After a late Stoke equaliser, Squiggly once again went into sixth form drama class mode trying to make out that there were reasons why he made absolutely no attempt to save a ball, once again, almost directly at him, giving Albion victory.

It is our opinion that there were indeed reasons.

A common form of fixed football match features one agent bolstering another via players on opposite sides - remember the event between Fulham and Wigan Athletic when Andy Johnson knew that he was going to score his hundredth goal (despite not having scored for 6 months).
The Squiggly on that occasion was ##### ######## who, by chance, is a client of John Colquhoun/Key Sports.
Colquhoun is also club agent at WBA where he represents James Morrison, Chris Brunt, George Thorne and Saido Berahino.

The West Brom shirt sponsors are the Antiguan bookmakers Bodog.
At market opening, they offered a best price on the planet of Evens money on a Stoke victory - B-Win, a big European firm, in comparison, were offering 3/4 at opening while Ladbrokes went 4/5.
The only other firm on the planet to match Bodog's Evens were Bet Victor - a company known to have close links with John Colquhoun.

Bodog held the tempting psychological price of Evens throughout the market while Bet Victor tempted even more money in their direction by drifting Stoke to 21/20. At any given time in the market, Bodog/Bet Victor were offering the best, joint best or almost the best value on a Stoke victory. The other leading European firms remained in the dark until the off although some of the slicker Asian outfits (including our backers) spotted the Squiggly in the making and were also looking to lay Stoke by the off.
An aside - despite the impact of Chinese New Year, Asian bookmakers are still streets ahead of the Euro-Bozos...
... that is why we work with them.

Now why did one firm from Antigua who sponsor West Brom and one bookie from Gibraltar with links to West Brom both feel so confident about the outcome on Saturday afternoon that they were willing to financially take on the might of the globe?
And by such a distance in value too.
If two of the biggest European firms were offering such markedly shorter odds, why once again was there such confidence in the Caribbean and in some stolen imperial afterthought in the Med?

Onto the game itself, James Morrison's value will have increased from the realisation that if he kept shooting, which he did, he was bound to score. He hit the woodwork more than once as well as scoring the first Squiggly goal.
Sorensen's body language needs to be mentioned at this point.
Our woman at the game (really) pointed out that Sorensen's reactions to tipping one of these shots on to a post were as psychologically uproarious as his reactions to the two goals.
It doesn't look good being angry at a good save and laughing after conceding a goal.

Now we are not saying that Thomas tanked the engine - his uselessness might just coincide by pure chance with a hyperreality and his reactions might be due to behavioural issues.
But the man is very high on our Squiggly list, including in Denmark games of yore, and he has got links to #### #########

Interestingly, as a clear indication of the fragmented cartel in European Match Fixing, there were those working against the Squiggly Scenario - indeed the efforts of gambling stable West Brom (and others including Stoke - owned by Bet 365) are frequently confronted by # #### ############ #########
There is being in the loop...
... and being in the loop.

In summation.
Two firms linked to West Bromwich Albion/John Colquhoun made a small fortune in a match where the gamble was landed only as a result of two incredibly unprofessional goalkeeping errors by a man who has previously enjoyed such correlations on more than one occasion.

The clear winners here are two bookmakers that are based offshore to avoid paying tax who have made oodles of money at no risk to themselves out of exploiting/fortunately benefiting from a Squiggly event to the continued demise of the sport we all love.
Everyone else is in what Sun Tzu might have termed Hyperreal Risk Territory and what ##################/ Dietrological/ Football is Fixed term Thirty Thirty Theory Territory.

Full text as ever is winging its way to Asia...
Kung Hei Fat Choi.

一本萬利

"May a small investment bring ten-thousandfold profits"

Sunday 22 January 2012

What An Incredible Fluke II!

After Manchester United lost to the combined might of Blackburn and Newcastle shipping six goals in the process, they were 'rewarded' with the selection of Chris Foy to referee the FA Cup tie at the Council Estate.

The rest is history.

For the next match against Bolton, Peter Walton was 'randomly' selected by the PGMOB to officiate.
He gave United a penalty which they proceeded to miss but ran out comfortable winners.

A not too unfamiliar scenario for Grandad Walton as the Red Devils are yet to lose in over 20 Premier League matches officiated by the old man.

For lovers of probability, there was a 1 in 342 chance of Man Utd being gifted these two referees in their hour of need.

And, historically, Foy and Walton have been the most pro-Man Utd of all the current refs.

What a weird fluke!

What An Incredible Fluke!

In five weeks time, we have the Merseyside derby.

Liverpool midfielders Jordan Henderson and Steve Gerrard are both on the books of Wasserman Media Group.
So are Everton goalkeeper Tim Howard and midfielder Landon Donovan.

Are we alone in finding this interesting?

Good job Wasserman aren't a gambling agency...
... but, wait a minute, they've got Michael Owen and Tottenham 'Four Olympic Spying Arrests and an allegedly tax avoiding manager' Hotspur on their books!

What a weird fluke!

The Fabrication of Reality and a Rigged Premier League Game

Newspapers are for news...
... not privatised profitable propaganda for one individual.

Football is for sport...
... not privatised profit on behalf on an insider ####### ##########.

First lets do journalism before moving onto its sibling, betting.

It always flushes out the murky does the January Transfer Window - with a business restriction of just one month within season, all manipulations, criminalities, envelope stuffing, bribing and pressurising are themselves pressured by time.

Good.
Such pressure increases the pascal, particularly on football agents.

John Colquhoun of Key Sports (and other extended tentacles of agentdom) has massive influence over the football output from the Guardian newspaper and this weekend is slightly over the top, even where his attitude to propaganda is concerned.

There are SEVEN articles or items that highlight his own clients or those clients that he ####### ####### ## #### ##### ##### ######

From the top, in 7/8 time, a one-two-three-four-five-six-seven...

Daniel Taylor (if he exists) writes an article on Ravel Morrison.
Morrison is the troublesome Man Utd youngster who spends more time in court than on the pitch (literally).
United want shut of him and the Guardian informed us that Newcastle had had a £500K offer rejected earlier in the week.
Ravel's Bolero skills produced a signing with John Colquhoun's Key Sport Management and he has now entered into a much more complicated ####### ### #### ### ##### ### #### ############# #### ####### ### ######### ########### ############# ### ##### ## ########## between ##### ###### ### #########

The article is no more than an advert for Morrison.

"But Morrison was alone, bar his solicitor... Things have turned nasty and someone is spinning the truth... behind the scenes they talk of him being as naturally gifted as Paul Scholes. Barcelona have asked about him... On the football pitch, he plays with finesse and confidence... Lesser players have moved up, which he has found hard to take... the district judge questioned whether the club were giving him the right care... This could be a £40m footballer in a few years..."

What a load of shite...

This is allegedly the second most read article on the Guardian site!

Oh come on! Confidence leads to Sloppiness!

Secondly, we are expected to believe that "Our Favourite Thing" for all Guardian journalists all week has been some pitiful output about Phil Jones (a Colquhoun client) being better in midfield than in defence when he is a speedy yet headless chicken in both - football is a team sport, it is not about running at pace prior to performing a random event.

Thirdly and fourthly, following a photo shot of Theo Walcott (one of Johnny's) celebrating the best of previous Man Utd v Arsenal games (one struggles to pick out one Walcott performance worthy of such focus), Dodgy Williams moans on about the frugality of Mr Wenger who, by absolute coincidence, is currently negotiating with Colquhoun over a new contract for the lad who has also perfected the unskill of running very fast with a random event on completion.
Fantastic journalism.

Fifthly, there was the weekly propaganda that is the Secret Footballer, the Secret Agent.
We lost count of the number of aliases that Mr Colquhoun used in communication with the various cells of our infrastructure!!

Sixthly, apparently the most important match in Europe this weekend according to the Guardian has been the victory by Twente Enschede against lowly Waalwijk in the Netherlands. Much bigger than the restart of the Bundesliga with Moenchengladbach beating FC Bayern or the most atmospheric derby in Europe (Real Betis v Sevilla) or Totti scoring two goals for Roma. Close friend and ######### ########## ## ### ######## ###### #### with Colquhoun is Steve McClaren who, by chance, is Twente's new manager.
After three awful failures in his last four jobs, this is McClaren's last chance in football having been rejected by all and sundry in the EPL or it is a "convincing comeback" according to the Guardian, takes your pick.
Fantastic journalism.

Seventhly, we have an unmention of a client of Key Sports.
James Morrison would normally have been lauded in the Guardian for scoring and having a good game against Stoke.
Ah! But...
... and Ah! But again.

"After the game, the Albion manager, Roy Hodgson, was forced to defend the scorer of his side's first goal, James Morrison, for an apparent gesture towards the home supporters. Morrison had wheeled away in celebration towards the Stoke fans, initially with his arms outstretched. However, perhaps reacting to a comment, he then quickly placed his left hand on his right upper arm and delivered an upwards fist-pump gesture. "Did he do that?" said Hodgson. "Blimey. You guys [the media] see everything. That gesture could be interpreted in a thousand ways.""

Journalists seeing everything eh Roy!? A thousand ways eh Roy!!?? - Colquhoun for the uninitiated is club agent at WBA.

There was even a mention of Colquhoun client Clarke Carlisle in an article in the paper about footballers with degrees, even though he doesn't have one.
Fantastic journalism.

SEVEN focuses/selective unfocus, and a spurious mention on one web page!
Thank goodness David James (another of Colly's) wasn't doing one of his fortnightly pieces on the site as well!

Key Sports rank their clients for us on their website - Theo Walcott, Phil Jones, Chris Brunt, Josh McEachran, David James, Francis Muamba, Ryan Bertrand, James Morrison...

Now then...
... what is the probability of that balance of coverage, girls and boys?

Q.E.D.

People are expected to take this as real, for feck's sake.
But there are other levels that are markedly more concerning.

As with another 'former' Key Sports client who features regularly on the Guardian site Jordan Henderson, Ravel Morrison has an interesting ownership structure ######### ######## ########### ### ########## ####### ###### ############### ##### ### ## ############## ######### ######### #######
## ### ### ##### ########## ######### ###############
########## ####### ######### ################# ### ## ######## #####

There is also the little matter of the match in which James Morrison scored against Stoke City yesterday - More Reasons to Shop ########. ########### ##### ## ### ###### ########## #### ############ #### ######### ############# ## ### ############## ####
##### ## ######## ### #### ######### ##### ## ################ ## #### ########## ## #### ################ #######
###### ########### ## ### ###### ######## ### ############## ######## ##### #### ### ###########

Somebody at West Bromwich very obviously knew about this pre-match as may be seen from certain betting patterns.
################## ## ######### ##### ###################### ### ########### ### ########## #####
Two linked firms of bookmakers took on the world (literally) in this Stoke v West Brom game offering the best price on a Stoke win for almost the whole market window - and one of them was the West Brom shirt sponsor, Bodog.
The other was ### ######
How come the confidence?
##### ###### ########### ### ####### ## ####### ########## ### ### #### ########### ### ### ###### # ####### ### ## #######
######## ####

Aren't journalists supposed to cover things like 3rd Party Ownership, Fixed Matches, Harry Redknapp's forthcoming trial, the Calciopoli II crisis in Italy, the takeover of Reading FC by a Russian consortium, the sixth illegal takeover of Portsmouth in 2 years, the 'control' of certain EPL events over xmas etc etc?
You know, real stuff of real interest about real things.

As Alan Rusbridger won't enter into conversation with us on the matter of Guardian football output and John Colquhoun/Key Sports, #### ## #### ###### ### ######### ###### ######### ## ### ##########
########## #### ###### ##### ###### ###### #### ## ### ############
######?
######??
######???

Alas.
It will be up to our backers to decide.

Wednesday 18 January 2012

... A Coda

... the blackmail gone wrong, the betting slip, the former drug dealer, a peripheral company with a grudge, the jilted girlfriend, the jilted boyfriend, Gigi Becali, a private bank collapse, that bitter enemy, a money laundering court case, the state choosing to tax the sector, Berezovsky about Abramovich, the secretary who really didn't appreciate that grope at the xmas party, mainstream journalists choosing to write truth rather than absolute shite, a dropped player, Poland/Ukraine informational leak, a phone hack, the nosey neighbours of a Robbie Savage type avatar, an email hack, a private bookmaker to gain market share, a burglary, that hidden camera, a robbery, that cash pile photographed as it was being placed in the envelope, a maverick, the abused daughter, UEFA exercise their grudge against the EPL, a sacked employee, France, that guy with the bullet mike in that silver van across the way, Eire, an IT man who just happened to leave a sleeping cookie on the machine, Wales, the woman in the next hotel room, Scotland, Jeremy Clarkson to sell a feckin' book of reactionary garbage, Germany, a French postmodernist with an aptitude for the spectacular, Jamaica, a pitch invader/streaker, a goalscorer on his t-shirt, India, a Black Swan, GamCare, a cornered market, a hyperreal illusionist, Pakistan, a high class call girl, an accidental 'cc', Zimbabwe, somebody who has discovered Nietzsche or Zizek or Chomsky or Baudrillard, someone in the right casino but at the wrong time, Haiti, an ex-insider who finds God or Morals or Both or Whatever, the EU, Putin (he got the World Cup, what must he know?), bin Hammam or Warner, a coup de grace, that Labour MP who looks 12 and comes from Leigh, someone disclosing some of the 3rd Party Club Ownerships at the top of the game, a former wife, a Gibraltan employee, a bonded employee from Macau, a FIFA shakedown, Interpol doing something, a broker or market maker with a grudge, the Asian underground choosing to release information in collusion with, the Chinese government, Richard Scudamore's horseracing contacts, a private detective, jealousy from other European leagues if/when the 50% tax barrier is lowered, a discovered alias, the hidden dictaphone, a former PA, GCHQ, the owner of that gay club, an angry stepchild, the Campaign for Racial Equality, Mario Balotelli in form other than a Tweet, Cantona, a Ryan conquest, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, John Pilger, Chavez or Castro, an eavesdropper, the cleaner who rifles the bins, an overheard row, and last but not least, someone who combines many of these inputs together, Rupert Murdoch and The Murdochratic Team.

Oh! The Fragmented Cartel...

Tuesday 17 January 2012

The Fine Arts of War and Whistle-blowing

The timing of intuitions are markedly more accurate if one is dealing with a range of scenario evaluations utilising an atmospheric analysis of a core competency.

Or...
... you can time things better if you know your stuff.

Welcome to the Football is Fixed Guide to Creative Strategy and Grassing.

First things first.

Across the world, corruption and match fixing in football is being paraded through the courts.
Plus.
FIFA is endemically corrupt.
Plus.
A significant percentage of match officials in Europe are linked directly or indirectly, with their knowledge or without, to the global betting markets where over $2.5 billion a game is the common market on major European matches.
Plus.
Italy has already reached the stage of the sequel - the Return of Calciopoli - the one where 18 high level players are arrested (making 37 in total) last December around the date that Silvio Steps Aside - Silvio Stepping Aside Day as it will be celebrated across Europe for centuries to come.

Ah! But in England, isn't it all so hunky dory, so it is.

But not for long.
We all got around and had this little chat in December and in our collective esteemed estimations, there is a 30% chance that a seriously brand-damaging scandal will erupt around the English Premier League in the next 30 active rounds.
We have called it the Thirty Thirty Theory (30/30Th).
And, unlike those End-Of-The-World-Merchants, by not confining ourselves to a certainty, we will, as usual, be correct either way - yup, we predicted the arrest of a **************** so we did/ we were 70% certain that the game would remain clean for the period so we were.
Takes you pick...

Suddenly everyone is on about the Art of Whistle-blowing - that peripheral Art where you reveal that your government are actually crooks in suits and end up spending 400+ days in solitary confinement for your troubles/ in Sweden awaiting extradition so that you too might also be introduced to the wonders of self ad nauseum in the HyperImperium.
Takes your pick...

But Obama encouraged whistle-blowing...

Or how about the whistle-blower who exposed the insider trading by the wife of the [ex] president of the Swiss National Bank, Philipp Hildebrand - The Economist: "A straw poll this week suggested that a majority of the Swiss public views whistle-blowing as no excuse to breach bank secrecy, and regrets the departure of Mr Hildebrand."

At Football is Fixed, we learned very early on not to do the whistle-blowing thing - a few chats with government figures, regulators, administrators, officials, managers, players, criminals, police, lawyers, media, woodlice and last (but least) agents, made it quite clear that we are dealing with a fragmented cartel here.

It was like when cuddly bumpkin Gordon Strachan was being paid to utter inanities during a recent televised betting occasion. He was referring to racism but he could have been banging on about any part of the game. He suggested that racism wasn't a problem in football because it wasn't a problem amongst his insider peer group - that would be the expert analysts, the ex-players, the commentators, presenters, or, further back, the board of directors, the financiers, the legal team, the strategists and Desmond.
Strangely enough racism isn't an issue in any of these circles because there isn't a non-white face available to be racist towards.

There are more people with red hair in the Celtic FC hierarchy than there are Black referees, Black administrators, Black managers, Black owners, Black chief executives combined in the entire British game.

The complacency behind such bumpkinness is one reason why, at some point very soon, someone is going to push their luck too far in the rigged match world.

As Quantum Mechanics should tell us: In a loop + Out of touch = Danger.

Confidence leads to Sloppiness.

And when the game is sitting on an administrative and insider mass malfeasance of neohyperreal proportions, there are just too many weak spots for an unpleasant major truth to erupt.
Someone being threatened or coerced, someone seeking police protection, a Mario Balotelli Tweet, someone feeling desperate, someone seeking political gain, someone telephoning the Interpol whistle-blower line soon to be set up, someone seeking a power shift, someone wishing for creative destruction, an Anarchist, someone with a penchant for mockery, a do-gooder, Mike Newell, a jealous colleague not in on the scam, forensic analysis of sloppy administration, an investigative journalist, a betting 'accident' live on tv, a suicide note, a mafia killing, some overseer or politician actually doing their job, that sort of thing...

That's an awful lot of bases for a fragmented cartel to keep covered.
And the EPL is hardly Goldman Sachs.

Careless corruption always breaks.
The EPL is a slow motion accident waiting to happen.

Sun Tzu, when translated into corporate psycho-babble, offers the following advice in windows of turmoil.
Develop a Complex Layered Strategy able to respond at speed to Black Swan Uproars (both threatening and rewarding) and undertake repeated probabilistic assessments of various Scenario Analyses as the Simulacra Unfolds.
Share knowledge only in the General and never the Specific and adjust lines of Security and Isolationism.
Observe and Take Advantage.

Twice recently sports betting market anomalies/criminalities have featured on the Financial Times homepage.
There is more serious interest being taken in betting corruption but we will deal on that one in the next post in this series.

But, in the meantime, let us hope that the English game has a Javi Poves out there.

Poves is the Sporting Gijon central defender who retired last year at the age of 23 due to the amount of corruption in the Spanish game.

"Football is cash and corruption. It's capitalism. And capitalism is death."

So it is.

Saturday 7 January 2012

King Kenny is the Missing Link

For transitional fossil Kenny Dalglish, it is surely time to evolve.
Last nights racist abuse of Tom Adeyemi is purely the fault of the Liverpool Football Club.

Dalglish and his players are heroes to some very very stupid people.
These neuronically moronic pick up mass hysterias that allow them to shroud their inate fear and weaknesses with the misplaced sense of hyper-power that is racism.

Racism.

The wearing of Suarez support t shirts, club media spokesperson Alan Hansen thinking Black people are coloured, the "All Together" mosaic featuring Suarez on the back of the Kop, the refusal to apologise for the institutional racism enveloping the club - the owners, management and players should be ashamed.

Why hasn't Dalglish got the capacity to face up to the fact that he is out of touch, out of date, out of his depth and both wrong and racist?

Slavery ended ages and ages and ages ago...
... just prior to Liverpool's last title win, in fact.
The world has moved on since Us Mancs had to build the Manchester Ship Canal to help that process on its way, while also neatly sidestepping your tariffs, your monopolies, your port cartels and your sectarian employment practices of yesteryear.

It is not valid to call someone "a negro".
Not once.
Never mind seven times.

Suarez is hardly the most kosher individual to stand up for anyway.
The man has form.

Known as the "Cannibal of Ajax" for biting Otman Bakkal (of Moroccan origin), Mr Suarez was banned for seven games.
The previous season he had been suspended for fighting with mixed heritage Ajax teammate, Ibrahim Afellay.
The year prior to that, Suarez fought with previous club FC Groningen over his transfer to Ajax. Despite taking his club to the KNVB, he lost his case.
Then there was the middle-fingered salute at Fulham.

In the words of Marco van Basten: "Luis is unpredictable."

Suarez earns a lot of money and when in Rome...

Ah!
But that is the rub of it.
From the perspective of Mr Suarez, why am I being punished for being racist in a country where my teammates, my team manager, my employers, the Premier League, the League Management Association, the BBC, the Prime Minister and the Queen's husband and late motherfucker are all renowned for differentiating on race?

England is still not that much different from the Rhodesia it spawned.

The recent rise in racist murders and attacks in the country, the hijacking of government agenda by the intellectual wing of the EDF, institutional racism in the police, the ghettoisation of our major cities, Kiaran Stapleton feeling comfortable enough with his crime to name himself "Psycho Stapleton" when appearing in court to be charged with shooting Anuj Bidve in the head on Christmas night, and yet the demand goes out from the BBC and all Right-minded people that Diane Abbott MP should apologise for insinuating that the UK is a nasty racist little entity founded on slavery and the workhouse, run by white people who utilise divide and rule as a primary tool of power.

It is all the same shit.

People who see Hillsborough but not Heysel also only see racist stereotypes.

It is time for King Kenny, his players, Richard Scudamore, John Henry and Luis Suarez to stand in front of the Kop and explain why it is time to evolve.

Thursday 5 January 2012

The End of Manchester United As We Know It

On the 23rd of October 2011, an idea for an app came to mind...
... the number nineteen on a red background would slowly morph into 1-6 on a sky blue background.

Less than a fortnight later and Steve Bruce and Wes Brown were needed to ensure that Sir Ferguson's 25th anniversary was marketed correctly.
The naming of the Sir Alex Ferguson Stand on that very date was the ultimate sell sign.

Manchester United are in terminal decline - there are no redeeming aspects.
Like Chelsea post-Mourinho, the fade from glory will see the occasional triumph but the days of dominance will fade into the mists of universal time.

Unable to get more than three draws against the might of Basel and Benfica, the financial cost of failing to reach the second phase of the Champions League is colossal.
Even more so when oodles of cash are needed to fund the interest payments on the leveraged buyout enacted by the Glazers in their medium term strategy of asset stripping par excellence, while grabbing some financial action themselves.

And the internal psychology of the club is in decline too.
Insider trading from within Manchester United accompanied both of their Champions League Final defeats to Barcelona (hardly an indication of a robust structure). United were not even competitive in either of these events.

Massive insider trading against United was also undertaken prior to the two most recent defeats against Blackburn (bottom of the table) and Newcastle (five points from 8 games prior to Man U). Very serious money indeed was traded against the mighty reds in both games.
You could get 30/1 on Blackburn winning!!!

The holistic is dire - Ferguson announcing three more years (and the timing) is a strategic weakness, the battling with an already declining Rooney is counter-productive, while chatting with Asian bookmakers is surely not what one should expect from a knight of the monarchy.

There is no waiting list for season tickets, and tickets are available for virtually all home games, the power structures behind Liverpool, Sunderland, Newcastle, Chelsea, Tottenham, Villa, Manchester City (especially) and even Stoke are more robust (only Arsenal are similarly self-harming), Ronaldo and Tevez haven't been replaced and there is no money available for anything other than low/mid tier transfers.
Worse still, the 'acclaimed' next wave of youth is not looking quite so promising anymore - they are certainly not Giggs, Scholes, the Nevilles and Beckham anyway.

And even worse still, the available squad in their current state of injuries, form and mind are simply not up to it.

De Gea is not der Sar.
Lindegaard's mentor is Roy Carroll to the delight of the laying community. Hence the media campaign against De Gea.

United don't have a right back, Jones is an incredibly amusing blundering buffoon - it is a little like watching Tommy Cooper on wiz as his three own goals this season outscore his one goal at the right end in his entire club career.
Ferdinand must have a good agent because he crossed the white finishing line a decade ago.
Vidic is out for an eternity and Smalling is injured. Evans is poor and only Evra is up to scratch in the defence.

Nani is not the player of last year, Fletcher is probably not going to play again, Giggs cannot juggle his sex life and the football for much longer, Carrick is useless, Gibson and Valencia haven't evolved and Anderson frustrates. Park is okay though.

Berbatov is a dodgy smoker, Rooney a loose cannon, the Little Pea has been podded and has lost some pace to boot, while Michael Owen has a Timeform squiggle next to his name.
So Welbeck is the only forward.

In comparison, City are stable.
Their owners have a long term strategy and are self-financing, so no payments to financial institutions.
City fit into the array of businesses that the Abu Dhabi Chaebol are assembling.
The psychology is positive. The sky is the limit. The best young kids are veering to City.
Tevez hasn't been missed and can be replaced by anyone they want as Champions League is no longer a distraction.

I was at Newcastle for Manchester City's 4-3 victory that gave the Sky Blues the title in 1968 - United imploded on the same day at home to Sunderland.
So it seems apt that City fans can start celebrating the next title on the night that United yet again imploded against a north eastern team.
And 44 years and 2 days on, City will be handed the EPL trophy as United no doubt implode once again against Sunderland on May 11th.

Knowing when to stop is the mark of a man.
Sir Ferguson is going on three years too far...
... for his legacy and for the club.