Thursday 28 May 2009

Myths Not To Be Missed And Other Alliaceae #

Premier League No Longer Permitted To Use The Word 'Sport' In Advertising

Following government intervention, the Premier League has had to pretend to make changes to the manner in which it is directly manipulated by the powers-that-be.

In the Casino of Un-Life, the Product may no longer be referred to as a Sport - an active diversion requiring physical exertion and competition.

Obviously, there are two structural complaints worthy of being aired here.

Firstly, the Premier League is not a diversion, an activity that amuses or stimulates, but the primary mode, the fundamental vein through which pumps the lifeblood of your 'sporting' neohyperrealities.

Secondly, and of similar magnitude, too many versions of this 'Sport' are not competitive in the true sense of the word. There is, of course, a friction, a tension between the actors and the masses of the bewildered, but sublimation to the Phase of the Image renders such a dynamic of minimal consequence.

It matters more when there's money on it?
It matters more when there's Integrity in it.

Ratings Agencies Admit Using Numerology In Assessments, Geithner Seen Clutching The I Ching

There were numerous causes of the Depression at all levels in the monstrosity of the free market model.
As various bodies are placed in the stocks while rotting organic fruit and veg are thrown at them, other sectors of the matrix that caused the Depression continue to abuse unabated, undeterred by any regulatory constraints.

Take the Big 3 Ratings Agencies.
They failed us utterly in their rosy assessments of the financial well-being of a system that was obviously about to go belly-up.
All those AAA ratings seem so quaint from where we now stand.

One might think that Moody's, Standard & Poor and Fitch might have been taken out of the game - after all, they are paid for as institutions by the very people who they are supposed to be assessing.
Imagine assessing your boss (good) while she/he still has her/his hands on the wage packet (bad).

Not so.

ObamaWorld has excluded ALL of the smaller ratings agencies from receiving any of the Fed funding that is propping up the US system.
Money for the boys, literally.

As The Economist bemoaned: "But better no ratings at all, perhaps, than those of a discredited oligopoly supported by a short-sighted central bank."

It should be noted in this place that The Economist used to be a free market newspaper.

Hush Falls Over Training Ground As Benitez Stabs Player In Throat

In a row over who should get the last chocolate-coated churros, Liverpool manager Rafa Benitez knifed one of his squad in front of a disbelieving squad last week, it is reported.
Fresh from the twin controversies over blaming the small size of his 62 player squad for his failure to win the Premier League title, and his refusal to congratulate Sir Ferguson on his title success, Benitez refused to talk to the media in the aftermath of the alleged attack, claiming simply that it was an "internal matter".

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Country Ready To Be Lied To About The Economy Yet Again

The Office of National Statistics (ONS) has admitted that it overstated the volume of retail sales growth since August 2007 by 56%!
Fifty Six Per Cent!!
Only last September, Karen Dunnell of that august group of data-crunchers stated, with tongue firmly in cheek: "ONS figures are the best available and they are not inaccurate."

Interestingly, we do not include any ONS data in our Unified Trading Model (UTM).
We do assess their dissemination of disinformation for valid inputs though!

We suggest that you keep looking at your illusory green shoots of recovery.
Green shoots that are based solely on "more optimistic" official figures from the Chinese government, and the reaction of leisure investors to this 'news'.

Stupid Man Overshadowed By Louder Stupid Man

Watching the eclipsing of Ronaldo by the infinitely superior Lionel Messi last night, our joy was only nuanced by the quality of the broadcasting.
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BSkyB ignored the match and allowed two stupidities to argue over match minutiae - Souness defeated Jamie on points, after threatening a Glasgow grin and simply refusing to stop speaking.
We almost missed the start of the Second Half through watching their merry jousting.

Yahweh Makes Surprise Visit To Local Synagogue

There are strong rumours emanating from the Occupied Territories of Palestine that the congregation at an illegally built Israeli place of worship was shocked and silenced by a visitation of Yahweh last Saturday.
Eye-witnesses said that she hovered in, looked around, shook her head, before leaving by a side-door.
Unsubstantiated reports suggest that she was later seen digging a tunnel between Gaza and Egypt.
Netanyahu ordered drones to flatten the supply routes on hearing the news...

City Of London Police Embark On Epic Delay

After having promised to tell us if ######################################## are guilty or not for nearly two years now, the City of London police are set to announce yet another delay to yet another illusory deadline, to occur sometime after the British government has installed a statute of limitations bill.

Life does seem to have improved remarkably for the array of characters involved in the alleged illegalities and others exposed on the BBC Panorama programme into bungs.

'Arry has crawled out of the swamp to Spurs.
He is joined by Bond, Kevin Bond, the only man yet to lose a job over the affair (out of Bournemouth, into Spurs).
Allardyce is at Blackburn.
Arneson remains at Chelsea.
Willie McKay is still in a position to offer ########################################
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Brady and Sullivan have just been promoted back to the Premier League with Birmingham City.
Milan Mandaric has just gained the League One title and promotion with Leicester City.
Peter Storrie has had his financial difficulties with Portsmouth owner Arkadi Gaydamak solved by the proposed takeover by Sulaiman Al Fahim.
Richard Scudamore still exists as an omnipotent ruiner of the event.

Why does Britain look increasingly like Italy, and why is Italy about to allow their calcio to be Murdochratised?

Bobby Zamora To Feature On Sesame Street

Agent admits that the Fulham striker is set to star in the hit US children's tv show.
He will be dressed in an outsized clown-suit, and will run around the street, buffoon-fashion, barging into objects and generally bringing mayhem to proceedings.
But because he has such a goofy grin, nobody will mind really.

Direct Correlation Shown Between Enhanced Torture Techniques And Future Prosperity

There is gathering evidence to suggest that the illicit use of enhanced cruelty techniques in US/UK secret prisons is positively correlated with the future financial well-being of the nation undertaking the torturing, for it is never just one individual bad apple.
Wall Street moved relentlessly and irrationally upwards while all of our heroes were instigating their pranks.
As soon as the lily-livered human rights brigade got involved, the techniques had to be sidelined in favour of more minor transgressions of international law.
And what happens?
Only the biggest Depression ever!

Cheney calls for Extraordinary Rendition to End Extraordinary Recession.

Slavoj Žižek: "... the greatest victims of publicly admitted torture are all of us, the public that is informed about it. We should all be aware that some precious part of our collective identity has been irretrievably lost. We are in the middle of a process of moral corruption: those in power are literally trying to break a part of our ethical backbone, to dampen and undo what is arguably civilisation's greatest achievement, the growth of our spontaneous moral sensitivity."

Mesmerically Ghastly Man Describes Loyalty

"When you go through that process of review, names come up, but that is only ever done internally. There was no need to take that process externally because we have a manager in place who we are very happy with" - Garry Cook of Manchester City.

Replace the word 'manager' with 'wife', and don't you just pity her, whoever she might be.
Pity City and pity Ms Cook.

"Should You Ever Feel Despair, Remember How Eloquent I Am"

Sepp Blatter on Our Great Leader: "He is working to make a lot of money and I'm working to have football as a social, cultural event around the world, being a school of life, bringing hope, bringing emotions. That's the difference."

Tin-pot dictator calls criminal, black, blacker...

"Grey carrion soul-mincing hope" or greyhound racing?

He was referring to torture, but ScudamoreWorld, being what it is, is Nothing if not Tortuous, so we'll end with one of Žižek's: "... they operate in empty space that is sustained by the law, and yet not regulated by the rule of law."

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© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Tuesday 26 May 2009

In Just About Everything #

"No comment."

"Stupid."

"Inexplicable."

"Everyone is telling me they were penalties."

The procession of statements from Kevin Blackwell as it slowly dawned on him that the Premier League don't want the likes of Sheffield United in the lodge, thank you very much.

An anonymous voice in ScudamoreWorld: "Oh hosanna! It's the lesser of two evils."

Caught between the rock of an eighth Premier League club from the North West of England and the hard place of the promotion of a team primarily responsible (in Our Great Leader's eyes) for the public exposure of the lack of self-regulation at the top of the Premier League, the very important people decided on the former.

Sheffield United have only themselves to blame.
Well, apart from the Premier League, West Ham United, Richard Scudamore, Sir Richards, Kia Joorabchian and a couple of British-based Russian oligarchs, that would be...
But the point is, if you are in waters infested with piranhas, you tend against self-harming.

The remainder of this post details the shenanigans underpinning the Championship Play Off Final and is for subscribers only.

* All posts labelled # are only available fully by subscription.

© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Monday 25 May 2009

Surviving Survival Sunday #

As Paul Hayward suitably points out in some damp and moss-ridden corner of our non-functioning mainstream media, Sir John Hall, the former Newcastle United oligarch opined: "We're like the Basques. We are fighting for a nation, the Geordie nation. Football is tribalism and we're Mohicans."

Tribalism.
Warfare.
Football.
Football distorted by Power.
Football distorted by Betting Markets.
Football distorted by a rum combination of Power and Betting Markets.

A Total Simulacrum.
A Fake Product.
A Ritualistic Self-Destruction of the Game.

I bought into these Phases of the Image when the progression was rooted in Football - a communitarian, social, regional and international competitive sport that, to a considerable height in the global hierarchy, was a legitimate representation of a meritocratic Tribalism.
The media Reality of 1960s' Internazionale and the like were icons of news precisely because of their scarcity.
Perhaps that is as good a reason as any to explain the complete absence of any assessment of the viral link between the bookmaking sector and match outcomes in today's firewalled media (FK Pobeda apart, of course) - because corruption is endemic, any exposure would completely shatter the Product that used to be Tribalism.

The Reality is completely obliterated.
Take the Tribalism/Football linkage...

Historically, most of the top teams in Britain are divided into one of two camps - Protestant or Catholic.
Simple.

This isn't particularly odd - Football came into existence as a result of the Famine, and the upheavals caused by the late 19th and early 20th century versions of Warfare.
If a new sport were to be established today, we would have an even broader base of communities competing - check out the old Australian leagues where the clubs represented Croat, Italian, Yugoslavian etc groups.
The competitive environment that made Glasgow, Manchester and Liverpool the primary hotbeds of Football talent was any one of a whole selection of Black and Tan versus Fenian Ram type encounters - check how many of our top teams had a church involved in their creation somewhere.

In our Scudamore Simulacrum, this cannot be spoken - the rivalries are not Tribal.
Only in Glasgow are the Troubles still mentioned by our media.

The Fake is Fake.

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The fact that the prawn sandwich has taken over from the cloth cap as the audience of choice for this phantasmagoric re-enactment certainly helps in the selling of this charade.

Insiders in the game - owners, managers, agents, players, referees, administrators, officials, journalists, other media and assorted members of the underworld - are forming ever tighter groupings to facilitate the final stage in the progression, where Football becomes a more liquid version of greyhound racing - another simulacrum, of course.

In the light of the numbing irrelevance of this entity, how could one take BSkyB/ScudamoreWorld Survival Sunday seriously?
The most Real parts of an afternoon of tyrannies of fun were Sir Ferguson's broad grin after the Newcastle result came through, and the collapse of the BSkyB computer meaning that, for much of the First Half, the viewer was unable to determine whether Survival was happening or not.
Lost hours of life...

From the safe perspective of Murky Market Monday ##############################
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© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Thursday 21 May 2009

Brighton In Bloom? #

Behind every great fortune is a forgotten crime.
And, behind every small fortune are a whole array of smaller forgotten criminal indiscretions.
But crimes they remain.

Anthony Grant Bloom is the new chairperson of Brighton And Hove Albion FC.
Bloom demanded the role in return for his financial commitment to the continuation of the Falmer Stadium Project (FSP).
Bloom effectively ousted Dick Knight, the man who in Bloom's own words "saved the club from almost certain extinction at a time when no one else was willing to come forward" in a poker powerplay.
Bloom, apparently, has the best interests of the club at heart.

A brilliant mathematician.
An internet gambling entrepreneur.
A property magnate.
A League One Roman Abramovich.
A former professional poker player.
An industry mogul.
A professional gambler.

Anthony Grant Bloom claims to be all these things and more.
Ah! The psycho-psychology of the silver spoon.

Anthony Grant Bloom likes a big gamble and his £80 million interest-free loan to the south-coast club is certainly that.
As his eminence himself decreed to the gathered masses (sic) on Tuesday: "The credit crisis hit as we were going to the banks. We just got unlucky, so I've had to make a bigger commitment than I would have envisaged."
How philanthropic can one get?

Now a scenario analyst of even moderate talent was able to demonstrate that the bottom was about to fall out of free market capitalism a decade ago. But to be actively involved in a commercial infrastructural project on the cusps of the Depression is non-strategic, to put it politely.
In fact, setting up a property development company on any level is just a tad myopic in a Depression.

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Banks pull on projects at times of market failure.
The banks know something that our gambling genius is unable to grasp - the Big Picture.

But the idiocy of the venture is only one reason why Brighton fans should be concerned as to this takeover of their club by #################, via little Anthony.
Below we reproduce abridged versions of some earlier posts on the business practices of our heroic and fearless post-Mensa hyperbrain.

"Anthony Grant Bloom was the founder of Premierbet and he used to act as an ######## ############## for the underground Asian betting markets for numerous European clients.
Bloom was my second broker. No computerised accounts were kept by Bloom for private trading activities and transactions, everything was scribbled on paper and kept away from prying and taxing eyes.
Premierbet became financially compromised once they were confronted by the larger European and Asian firms, and was eventually sold for a couple of used condoms and a fiver to Interactive Gaming Holdings plc (IGH), who proceeded to do a runner with all of their clients monies.
Somewhere in this financial hotchpotch, Bloom was able to set aside enough money to establish a property empire, a private box at Chelsea FC and numerous other business operations occupying #################################################"

"Leisure punters should be aware that leading London-based bookmaker Premierbet is no longer in business and, although visitors to their website are being told that the site is "unavailable for essential maintenance work", the truth is that the company is not available for the essential payment of its debt obligations to clients.
Premierbet's parent company is IGH who are listed on the AIM in London. The company stock was suspended on August 17th and yet the bookmaker continued accepting bets over last weekend in the full knowledge that any trades enacted and any monies deposited were to disappear into the black hole of IGH's illiquid bank accounts. IGH were seeking interim funding from General Capital Venture Finance Limited but the venture people pulled the plug on August 15th and, despite company claims, there is no other saviour waiting in the wings.
Premierbet were previously in financial uproar in 2005 when IGH bought it for a nominal fee after the bookmaker had been mismanaged for years by self-styled industry mogul, Tony Bloom. From day one, there was no coordinated decision on whether the new operation was going to trade at the cutting edge of the gambling sector by offering accounts to winning professional traders or whether the concern was merely going to cream slices of profit off the leisure betting punter. By gyrating between these two options, Premierbet ended up offering inappropriate levels of service to both pros and amateurs. Furthermore, the company was heavily dependent on accepting bets illegally from American clients and, when the Bush administration started arresting British executives for such behaviour, Premierbet's profits and shareprice plummeted. ############################################
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Now lets make this clear, the system is so tilted in favour of bookmaking operations that only incompetence of the highest degree may explain an inability to retain market presence and Premierbet were astounding in their degree of unprofessionalism. This culture dated back to Bloom's megalomaniacal style when in charge of the company and, as all buyout merchants understand, a company culture is the most difficult aspect to adjust after takeover (Bloom remained as a consultant).
In a competitive capitalist system, companies obviously must suffer the consequences of a lack of financial rigour but it is only the gambling sector and the illegal black and grey market sectors that provide no comeback for customers who are financially compromised by bankruptcy. There will be no assessment of creditors losses or needs and the directors of this shoddy operation will be able to walk away prior to reinventing themselves in some other form to be able to fleece the uninformed all over again. This is something that Britain's new Gambling Act ostentatiously fails to address - gambling winnings and banked money are not recoverable under law. The upshot of this tawdry state of affairs is that the sector will continue to attract the most abusive type of business charlatan."

There are numerous other people who we could quote on ###########################
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For example, how about the despair of a former Premierbet punter on the SportsBook Review site: "I can't understand how they are allowed to go on trading. My account is still open, and I have £1500 credit still showing. Can you advise me on anything I can do? They are ignoring my emails, and phone calls are directed to a London number which is constantly on answer machine."

And Brighton fans remain unconvinced if the blog responses are anything to go by at the Brighton Argus website.
One wisely selecting to be "a little wary of Bloom in any case", while another fears correctly that "I am not sure that I like the sound of one person having such a vast controlling interest in the club", and yet another wonders "how much is being loaned in unsecured loans?".

So apart from a satisfaction of his rampant narcissism and the development of another business template in which to unravel his antisocial short-termism, what else does the chairpersonship offer to our own little Abramovich?

Well 90% ownership of the club once the ground is completed, for starters...
Additionally, a close contact of Bloom informs me that our hero would not have "saved" the club if they had been relegated this year (they survived by three points).
That doesn't sound too solid a commitment to me.

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Bloom's gamble will only pay off if i) Brighton reach the Premier League, and ii) the Depression proves to be a myth.

There are ways in which the former agenda may be facilitated avoiding mainstream sporting competitiveness, but there is no way to avoid the impacts of the Depression.

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Although certain hyperowners and managers have familial links with the bookmaking fraternity, although leading agents play the markets on events under their control, although shirt sponsorship deals continue to provide exposure for Asian and European betting operations, although some players and referees are crooked, the Bloom takeover of Brighton is the first time that the fruits of gambling have been directly exposed at the pinnacle of an English club.

We will be analysing the markets on Brighton's matches in the future very closely indeed.
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Many moons ago in a telephone conversation with Bloom, I stated that "money isn't everything."
There was a palpable silence thing going on at the other end of the line.
Plus ça change...

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© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Tuesday 19 May 2009

The Makings Of A Manic Depression

Quantitative Easing, Counterfeiting, Deflation/Stagflation v Inflation/Hyperinflation, Dark Pools, Insider Trading

All neoclassical economists understand that there are two aspects of quantitative easing (QE) that must be activated in order for this extremely risky strategy to work.

The money supply must be increased via the printing of more cash by the central banks and the velocity of the movement of that money around the system must be accelerated to suitably rapid levels.

One of the primary reasons why the Recession is becoming the Depression is that this velocity isn't happening - banks haven't been lending enough, people haven't been spending enough.
It will take extreme governmental action globally to increase this velocity.
In particular, the elderly of the rich world (where the majority of the static savings reside) are going to be "encouraged" to consume, and at quantity.

But it is good to see that the Black Market is lockstep with the financial elite in our self-harming determination to restage the 1930's.
Lima in Peru is where the global centre for counterfeiting cash is currently based - these types of businesses tend to trade on the hoof.
Apparently, a multitude of currencies are being created and the police are said to have only scratched the surface of the operation.

A formula: Excessive printing of money + A determination to avoid stagflation/deflation = Increasing probability of hyperinflation.
Which, in its foreboding shadow, "encourages" us all to be turning our cash into more stable strategic assets asap.

One can increase the velocity via instilling this fear in people, the fear that paper and coins will lose what, after all, is an implied value based on trust in an abstract concept.
This is an extreme strategy for a system which is allegedly showing "green shoots of recovery"!

Just how brinksmanship can one get?

So, what should you turn your cash into?

Land, artwork, property, gold, strategic market plays in robust sectors and an increasing focus on self-sufficiency, security and sustainability would all be preferable to any misplaced faith in cash, government securities or the products available under the majority of financial market templates.
Better still, co-operative and social living projects might be energised with collective effort and input.

Unfortunately, the modern is repeating the past.
Even during the public exposure of an array of scapegoats - Madoff, Stanford, Goodwin etc - the foundations of the next phase of this cataclysmic system were being put in place.

Dark Pools have recently disappeared from the mainstream financial media, which is slightly strange given that these trading platforms are determining all of our tomorrows.

These markets are non-regulated.
These markets are private.
These markets allow huge levels of institutional insider trading away from prying eyes.
These markets are an edge in the market place for the global financial elite.
These markets represent the equivalent of the tickertape in the 1929 version of a Depression - a logistical inefficiency that allows considerable market advantage to an inner pool of operators. This competitive advantage is particularly marked in windows of great volatility where the system is standing on the edge of a unidirectional breakpoint.

Until recently, if an insider at a huge US corporation wished to trade in stock in her/his own company, submissions had to be made to the Commitment of Traders Report (COT) which detailed the market activities of those with access to privileged information.
Incidentally, you will find very little mainstream media reference to the COT either.

Now, no such regulation exists - it is by-passed by the Dark Pools.

This is taking the whole era of laissez-faire free market capitalism to new levels of inappropriateness.
The public acts of contrition are matched and offset by private displays of financial psychopathy and power - thanks for the bailouts, we needed some speculative trading capital.

Imagine that you are a chief executive of a major US company.
You have privileged information regarding the negative forthcoming quarterly results and you are aware that this information, when public, will have a negative impact on the company share price.
You decide that, in the interests of all insiders, the Dark Pools are the location in which to take advantage of this knowledge.
And the market makers in these subterranean environments are only too pleased to accommodate the insider trade - primary level inside information is a very valuable advantage.
The market makers will then trade this information around the private markets in yet another high stakes game of hyperpoker, trying to gain market power through the trading of the Depression.

Eventually, when all the elite have stuffed their portfolios full of locked in profit, this information reaches the formal exchanges and mere mortals are left scratching their heads as to why shares in our fictitious company have suddenly plummeted 25% despite their being no public information to warrant such a precipitous decline.

Even some of the banks that have become involved in Dark Pools recognise the dangers presented by non-regulation but they are forced, by the necessity of competition, to become involved in the charade.

We are in the territory of Behavioural Psychology here.
There is a marked campaign to increase mass confidence in the system despite very obvious contrarian Realities.
This "green shoots of recovery" nonsense is a case in point.
From a market analytical perspective, the recent rebound in the global financial markets is totally irrational (apart from those cashing in on short-sold positions).
There are no fundamentals that justify this bulge in the market, and the systemic and super-systemic risks are at all-time highs due to the impact of Financial Fractals.

More Irrational Protuberance than Irrational Exuberance.

Olivier Blanchard, chief economist at the IMF, uses both of his faces to describe this new systemic Reality.
A reduction in uncertainty and catastrophe in the markets may be achieved "... by removing tail risks, and the perception of tail risks."

This is very revealing as to the current status of the free market hyperreality.

There are considerable numbers of high level research and consultancy projects being undertaken worldwide trying to find ways to eliminate the impact of Black Swan events - statistically unlikely events that occur more frequently than they should, with devastating impacts on the financial system.

This is a fruitless search.
These "tail risks" cannot be eliminated in a free market system.

But it is the second part of Blanchard's statement that is key to the current mainstream media agenda.
The utilisation of media to alter "the perception of tail risks" is the chosen template with regard to both financial markets and climate change.

The words "fiddling", "Rome" and "burns" spring to mind...

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Friday 15 May 2009

Who To Replace Hackett? #

When Keith Hackett, warts n'all, retires from his stewardship of the Professional Game Match Officials Board (PGMOB) next summer, he will be replaced by a current referee - either Mike Riley, Steve Bennett or Pete Walton.

This is a major decision for the future of the English game at its highest levels.
As the match officials are a significant part of the problem with Premier League football, the successful candidate will directly influence the hyperreal future of the Premier League.

One of these candidates stands head and shoulders above the others when the most important qualification for the post is taken into account - the ability, obviously entirely unconsciously, to tilt your match decisions in a direction most pleasing to the liabilities of a certain grouping of market makers.

In this post, we assess each of the candidates which is not a particularly edifying process and we suggest who, quite literally, is the bookmakers' favourite.

The remainder of this post is for subscribers only.

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© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Wednesday 13 May 2009

Do Not Fritter Your Twitter On Fripperies #

Welcome to the latest of our TwitterTicker posts - the conversion of minutiae into matter.

Finance Is Fucked

On May 7th, the Bank of England announced that it was buying a further £50 billion worth of government bonds, taking the total to £125 billion.

The Economist: "The point of quantitative easing (QE) is presumably to keep down bond yields so that high rates do not choke off the economic recovery. But if the economy does recover, then yields should naturally rise. If at that stage, central banks give up QE then yields will get a further push higher. So this is a policy that will prove very hard to retreat from... we have a circular system where the government lends (or buys stakes) in the banks which then lend it back to the government in the form of gilts. This creates a potential conflict of interest; one that already exists in the US where bankers seem to float between the government and the private sectors. QE may seem like a clever short-term measure to relieve market pressure but we will be dealing with its after-effects for years to come."

John Authers of the Financial Times: "It is the finances of the governments rather than the banks that are causing the greatest concern."

Old Slack Jaw, Britain's Depression Minder General, the man who gave the Bank of England control of interest rates, the man who established the toothless regulator, the man who abolished boom-and-bust, the man who will be costing us all oodles of assets for years to come through his role in the transference of a crisis of banking and financial greed into a social crisis that effects us all, the man who added the private finance initiative (PFI) as the cherry on the cake.

PFI - pretty fucked, innit?

The Slimings Of Our Great Leader

Our Great Leader, Richard Scudamore, has crawled out of his burrow on a couple of occasions recently.

Firstly, in order to offer support for the BSkyB/Premier League candidate for the AFC presidential election, Mr Bin Hammam and, secondly, to offer some platitudes to Andrew Burnham over the mismanagement of the said league.

The new fit-and-proper-persons test (FPPT) rulings are not a change that we can believe in.
In fact, in the areas of greatest concern - club ownership issues, the decision on what is a fit-and-proper-person, the unsustainable levels of debt - there is no change at all.

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Our Great Leader glanced down from his pedestal to decree: "I think it is probably right, on balance, that the public should know and supporters should know who owns their football club."

Some points...
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The most revealing part of the monologue, and there always is one mirror into the workings of the mind of Our Great Leader, was when Scudamore muttered about his "... journey of self-regulation".

That is the crux of the matter.

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Meanwhile, the Premier League and BSkyB can collectively rub their grubby little hands together in celebration of the fact that Setanta is struggling to pay the next £60 million instalment for tv rights due at the end of the month.

Down And Out In Paris And London And New York And Tokyo and Berlin And Reykjavik And Moscow And Madrid And Dublin And Talinn And Montreal...

So, toxic debts are now to be known as legacy assets.
Orwell would have approved.

In the unholy union between our elected representatives and the financial industry, we have been stitched up yet again.
The French are flirting with Revolutionary Socialism while the English are understood to be ever so vaguely dissatisfied.

Investors are to receive 85 cents on the dollar subsidy just for owning these 'legacy assets', ie these investors are guaranteed 85% of their money being returned to them in the worst case scenario. If these 'legacy assets' appreciate in value, even for just a window, then investors will be able to cash in on their risk-free investment.

And this is a rational response to the massive toxicity still in the global financial architecture?

Former IMF chief economist Simon Johnson portrays Wall Street as an oligarchy that has left a generation of politicians and regulators "mesmerised", while Thomas Hoenig, the president of the Federal Reserve bank of Kansas City, thinks that the banks have been "subsidised in becoming more economically and politically powerful".

The 'legacy asset' farce needs a swift deconstruction.
Take Wigan Athletic versus Manchester United match tonight.
The 'legacy asset' bet would go like this...
You bet on Manchester United to win at 1.30 (3/10).
If they win, you win.
If they don't, you are returned 5/6ths of your stake, which you may reinvest etc etc.
Do the maths, it is yet another redistributive asset grab.

Jean Baudrillard: "Every society that internalises its mad is a society invested in its depths by madness, which alone and everywhere ends up being symbolically exchanged under the legal status of normality. Madness has for several centuries worked hard on the society which confines it, and today the asylum walls have been removed, not because of some miraculous tolerance, but because madness has completed its normalising labour on society: madness has become pervasive, while at the same time it is forbidden a resting place. The asylum has been reabsorbed into the core of the social field, because normality has reached the point of perfection and assumed the characteristics of the asylum, because the virus of confinement has worked its way into every fibre of 'normal' existence."

Michael Owen Plays A Squiggly Doogle

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The Power Of The Markets

Financial Times: "The football bureaucracies, so innovative in marketing the sport, are strangely reactionary about keeping what happens on the pitch the same as it ever was... no-one wins from having games poorly refereed."

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Howard Webb: "I never want to have a negative impact on a game. I get no pleasure from not reaching the high standards we set ourselves."

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Lo And Behold!

Andrew Lo of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology: "Systemic risk is not even being measured."

And what about Fractal Risk?
And Super-Systemic Risk?

Thought not...

Lo: "If you have human personality and free markets, you are going to get crises. If you get rid of one, you won't."

And this is a free-marketeer speaking!

Now, which one shall we get rid of?

Trickledown Economics, You're Having A Laugh

Not too many free market delusionals shouting about the number of the poor who have been lifted out of poverty due to their odious system nowadays, are there?

Jean Baudrillard: "... the increasing hold of rationality on our culture has meant the successive extradition of inanimate nature, animals and inferior races into the Inhuman, while the cancer of the Human has invested the very society it claimed to contain within its absolute superiority."

Hiddink Hyperreality

With all the nonsense in the aftermath of the Barca victory, there was no focus whatsoever on the Real reason that Chelsea lost - ##########################
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That was the big deal.

The dichotomous biased refereeing is what you get in a hyperreal world.
The mainstream media then relishes and enhances this hyperreality until it becomes something totally Surreal.

Corruption experiences the Butterfly Effect too.

Not Nudge, But Grudge

Flann O'Brien: "What is important is food, money and opportunities for scoring off one's enemies."

The success of the recent free market bible, 'Nudge', together with the wisdom of Myles has encouraged us to add a 'Grudge' section to future TwitterTicker posts.

We will get it off our collective chests.

In homage to Myles, we will even borrow his historical template (of the type: "The Man Who Spoke Irish At A Time When It Was Neither Profitable Nor Popular").

And, finally, on this very point, we'll introduce you to "The Man Who Still Sings Wolfetones Songs In The Shower When The Neighbours Are Out"...

Why are the British Lions called the British Lions when Eire is represented?
Should it not be the 'British and Irish Leprechaun Lions?
Especially when Eire have just won the Grand Slam.

And remember, the average English person gets by on 400 words while a Gaelic speaker uses 4,000.

As Myles told us all: "The plight of the English speaker with his wretched box of 400 vocal beads may be imagined when I say that a really good Irish speaker would blurt out the whole 400 in one cosmic grunt. In Donegal there are native speakers who know so many million words that it is a matter of pride with them never to use the same word twice in a life-time."

And what is all this from 'A World To Win' (WTW) about the resurrection of a latter day Oliver Cromwell to deal with The Crisis?

Cromwell did genocide.

WTW is supposed to be on the Left and their last two columns have promoted a Cromwellian solution (plus a dig at Sinn Fein).

So, Cromwell or Revolutionary Socialism?
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* All posts labelled # are only available in full by subscription.

© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Sunday 10 May 2009

Busted! #

Our campaign against the corrupt consortium that have been match-fixing up to four Premier League matches per window has been successful.

We reached an agreement in April with a middle-person over our Consultancy Document focusing on this criminal ring and immediate action has been taken against the consortium, undermining their corrupt trading and match-fixing activities.

This is a major coup for a small independent blog and a clear statement that the Realities of football are to be found in the nooks and crannies rather than in our dysfunctional media circus, a charade that is directly involved in the rogue play.

The Premier League ###########################################################
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The consortium, should you have forgotten, consists of #######################
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Control of Premier League events was hyperrealised by the activities of the players, preferably with input from the match officials, wherever possible.

At the beginning of April, we released three posts (http://footballisfixed.blogspot.com/2009/04/competitive-advantage-rather-than-de.html; http://footballisfixed.blogspot.com/2009/04/competitive-advantage-rather-than-de_06.html; http://footballisfixed.blogspot.com/2009/04/competitive-advantage-rather-than-de_06.html) detailing the conspiracy and the High-Level Consultancy Document for sale.
The final post was published on April 8th.

By April 11th, the first reactions had occurred.

Throughout the window of corruption, there have been certain match officials who have been, shall we say, problematical to the activities of our criminalised clan - the Premier League/PGMOB ###################################################
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In the most recent thirteen matches involving the clubs wittingly or unwittingly involved in this corruption, problematical match referees have been selected in 12 of the games.

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This achievement deserves to be celebrated.
It is also a clear indication of the way that we view our blogging Reality.

We could just have stayed quiet about this criminal conspiracy, quietly trading our knowledge, information and analysis across a range of brokers, not being too greedy, and we could have amassed a small fortune mimicking the trading activities of the crooked clan.

Instead, we went public, open source.
And we have received some recompense for our deliberations.
But such recompense is pitiful in comparison with the Real market worth of our analyses.

This one hyperscenario will not, of course, change the impact of insider trading and the betting markets in general on the outcome of football matches.
Nor will it even prevent this consortium from continuing with their criminalised strategy - they were successful in a match yesterday in the Premier League.
But it will make their psychopathy more compressed.
There are individuals working against their dynamic on the field of play, in the administrative circles and in the alternative media.

Citizen journalism can have an impact.

In a post-Deleuzian neohyperreality, it is feasible to stand in postmodernity and prick the bubble of modernity with its fake illusions.

What a pity that the mainstream media remains out of this loop.

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* All posts labelled # are only available in full by subscription.

© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Thursday 7 May 2009

Manchester La La La, Barcelona Olé Olé Olé #

What is it with London?

What is it with Madrid?

In your centralised loci of power, in your stratospheric fake, you assume that your goals may always be purchased on the non-level playing field of life.

Take football and the purchase of illusory glory.

Take your Performance Enhancing Substances (PESs), bribe your match officials, bend the rules of the game, and the nationalistic and non-functioning mainstream sporting media plays along.

Then, when your spoilt mardiness surfaces in the aftermath of further failed criminalisation of the sport, only a biased and nuanced perspective is offered.

Drogba is correct.
It is "a fucking disgrace" but it is all a fucking disgrace, and not just when some shady oligarch gets his comeuppance.

Neither Madrid nor London is able to deal with the Reality that the best and most successful football is played outside the capitals - in Barcelona and Manchester - in the Second Cities.
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Barcelona v Chelsea

Over the two matches between Barca and Chelski, the refereeing errors balanced out to an extent - Chelsea via ##################################### controlled the event in the Camp Nou, while last night the tilt was the other way.
Yet, the overall balance of decision making remained in Chelsea's favour after the tie was completed.
The outbursts were merely selective memory and a public display of the impotence that Mr Abramovich is not yet powerful enough to buy all of the toys he chooses.

The hissy fits were invalid.

Barcelona played football in both matches against Chelsea and hammered the Madrilenos in the middle. Chelsea tried to spoil throughout.

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Stop your cheating.
Stop your bleating.
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Manchester United v Arsenal

Les Hommes contre les Bébés.

The Super Outsiders morph into the Super No-Hopers.

Manchester Men against Arsenal Adolescents.

Kroenke or Usmanov - who cares?

Was the sale of Fiszman's shares to Kroenke legal or should they have been made available on open market?

Whatever, Wenger misjudged his strategy by ending the title race at Anfield.

Wenger misjudged his strategy by spending £14 million on a player who could not play in the club's primary focus competition.

Girlie screaming and the waving of pseudo-flags does not ring true when half of these self-same people showed the true depth of their support by leaving the stadium after 60 minutes.

At Middlesbrough on Saturday, Manchester United fans sung over 30 different, largely club-specific, chants including the poetic "you're going down with the Shearer".

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What a load of old tosh.

The Dream Final is Manchester versus Barcelona.

Messi v Ronaldo or Malouda v Walcott?

Get Real.
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* All posts labelled # are only available in full by subscription.

© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological

Sunday 3 May 2009

Premier League Reality Check #

Want to know how the Premier League table would look this morning without the rogue input of the Professional Game Match Officials Board (PGMOB), corrupted players and the malicious impacts of a variety of market-making organisations?

Want a peek at Reality?

Our Traders maintain Real-Time Reality tables for all the territories that we cover.
This knowledge is carefully crafted by our outsourced match monitoring and by the proprietary input of our specialists.
We are able to eliminate the rogue inputs although, obviously, the matches might have progressed differently if a particular penalty/goal had been given, or not.
This latter type of randomisation should truly be random and, hence, over a season should not impact too heavily on the data.

However, when the corrupting forces imply that things 'level out' over the season, they are exhibiting even more economies of truth than is generally the case in their shoddy little fake worlds.

The Real Premier League table demonstrates this.

FIVE teams have a Real points total that is more than 12 points from the ScudamoreWorld take on the game.

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And we would have a title race too - Chelsea would be 2 points ahead of United with the Manc's having a game in hand.

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And the handicap nature of this year's fake footie is forcefully demonstrated when we apply pattern recognition analytical techniques to the raw data.
The probability of the league table being so 'compressed' is revealing (and not for this place - you'll have to wait for the book).

And the corrupt consortium that we have focused on repeatedly over the current season?
It should be no surprise that a criminal collective of critical players, an agent, a manager, a bunch of match officials and a selection of private markets in which to 'secretly' trade your criminalities has produced benefits for the teams involved.
The three primary teams involved have seen their combined points totalisations inflated by 19 points.

Crime pays.
A double whammy!
You fix the games for proprietary profit and you fix the table so that such shenanigans may continue next season (although idiocy in the strategic department means that one of the teams involved in this corruption will be back in the Championship next year).
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THERE IS A SOLUTION TO THIS MASSIVE CORRUPTION WHICH DOES NOT INVOLVE REGULATION OF THE BOOKMAKERS AND THE PRIVATE MARKETS.

EACH MANAGER SHOULD BE ABLE TO QUESTION 4 REFEREEING DECISIONS IN EACH GAME.
A VIDEO OFFICIAL ON OPEN MICROPHONE WOULD ASSESS THE PLAY FROM DIFFERENT ANGLES BEFORE MAKING A DECISION.

THE REFEREE WOULD HAVE NO SAY AND THE VIDEO OFFICIAL AND REFEREE SHOULD NOT BE PAIRED UP MORE THAN IS STATISTICALLY LIKELY.

THE CORRUPTING INFLUENCES WOULD LOSE MUCH OF THEIR POWER.
ADDITIONALLY, THERE WOULD BE INCREASED FOCUS ON THE CORRUPTIONS AT PLAY.
CRIMINALISED MATCH OFFICIALS WOULD BE IN THE SPOTLIGHT DUE TO THE ABILITY TO MEASURE PERFORMANCE MERITOCRATICALLY.

CORRUPTION REQUIRES AS SMALL A GROUPING OF OPERATIVES AS POSSIBLE OTHERWISE LEAKAGE UNDERMINES THE SCAM.
IF THE GLOBAL CRIMINALS WERE FORCED TO BE CORRUPTING A LARGER GROUP IN ORDER TO ACTIVATE THEIR MATCH FIXING, THEIR CRIMINALITY WOULD BE UNDERMINED.

IT WOULD ALSO BE NECESSARY, AS WE HAVE ARGUED REPEATEDLY, TO EXPAND THE ROSTER AT THE PGMOB.
THERE ARE CURRENTLY 20 REFEREES ON THE SELECT GROUP OF WHOM THREE ARE INJURED, ONE IS CARRYING AN INJURY, ONE IS BEING REHABILITATED AFTER THREATENING HIS FORMER BUSINESS PARTNER, LEAVING JUST 15 REFEREES ON THE SELECT GROUP ROSTER.
THIS CREATES RIDICULOUS SCENARIOS.
FOR EXAMPLE, MIKE DEAN REFEREED MAN CITY VERSUS BLACKBURN YESTERDAY AND WILL ALSO REFEREE VILLA VERSUS HULL TOMORROW.
DOWD, MASON, STROUD, HALSEY, ATKINSON AND JONES ALSO HAVE TWO MATCHES OVER THE WEEKEND (ONE AS 4TH OFFICIAL).

WE WANT.
100 REFEREES.
4 MATCH CALLS PER GAME.
THE 100/4 SOLUTION TO FOOTBALLING CORRUPTION.
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Compare And Contrast

We posted the other day about the corruptions behind Chelsea's 'achievement' in the Champions League Semi Final First Leg in Barcelona.
The crooks would like this type of match to be the future of football - a betting market dominated event in which an outcome was purchased via the complicity of insiders.

On Thursday, in the UEFA Cup, the game between Werder Bremen and Hamburg was like a flashback to a time where the game mattered for pride and not profit. As David Pleat said: "I don't think I've seen a game of such intensity for a long time."

Last night, Barcelona demolished Real Madrid 6-2 in the Bernabeu in the most astonishing display of balletic football I've witnessed at this level of the game since the Murdochracy moved in on our sport.
Totally Total Football.

We have the choice of these two types of future.

Yet even these two pure events still had the grubby hands of the bookmakers at their peripheries.

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BSkyB were delaying the images during last night's El Clásico just in order to give the SkyBet operation the invalid tilt that it always requires in the market.
In everything.
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© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological